Thursday, September 2, 2010

I'm sleep walking..


Hana at D12 of life: an adorable lil gal but wait till she cry...

It's day 19 post partum.. means baby Hana Khadeeja is already 19 days old going to be day 20 tomorrow. Lambatnye masa berlalu, I can't wait for 40 days to be over and I hope it happens quickly. I think I did not prepare myself enough on motherhood, mentally and physically that is.

The first day that I brought Hana home to her Tok Ayah and Mommy's (my anak buah all called her grandma: mommy) house in Bangi, the whole household went uproar. She cried non stop for hours!! She was such a drama queen, my cousin nicknamed her. Even menangis on top of her lungs masa changed nappy that my dad (who had vision problem) thought that she was sick and unwell. We could't sleep the whole night and luckily my mom was there to help us. I alternate shift with her, rocking and holding Hana until she fell asleep. I was dumbfounded and did not know what went wrong with her that night: was it colic? was she hungry as my breast milk was still minimal? was it something mystical? I still could not figure it out.

My main problem even when Hana is 19 days old is that she has such an erratic sleep cycle. She sleeps MORE during the day and awake at night. What I mean by MORE is like 1 hour MAX! Most of the time, she'll BF until she dozes off and wakes up 15 minutes after I put her in the cot. She is such a light sleeper and stirred a lot. I noticed that she takes a longer nap if being hold, pat or rocked.

I feel like a zombie as I only get 1-2 hours of (interrupted) sleep per day and that is like doing back to back calls! It gets even worse at night that I finally decided to let her sleep prone on my chest or in my arms, for her and my sake.

There are so many other problems that I have to deal with: dry and cracked nipples, breast engorgement, back pain, my unresolving skin rash, and my baby's needs to BF every hour! I got depressed and there were times that I wanted to break down and cry!!!!

My hubby suggested to introduce formula milk and picifier and my dad asked us to get a rocker but I refused all of them (at the moment) . I congratulate my hubby as he tried to support me as much as he can but it would be such a great help if he has a pair of milk producing boobs!!

My mom said that it is normal for babies to have sleep problems especially babies dalam hari. She told me that things will get better once the baby reaches 1 month +.

So far, I'm still holding on and wishing and praying that everything that I'm stressed about will improve after habis pantang.


P/s I wonder how my mom handled all the 7 of us. She sure is the queen of my heart!

No wonder lah syurga di bawah telapak kaki ibu..

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

breastfeeding is definitely challenging but the key to success is never give up...there were nights that when i was in confinement i cried silently in bed as i have clogged duct...alhamdulillah my hubby was there....you can try to breastfeed you baby in lateral position or prone..this way it'll help both you and your bb hana to sleep...that's what i did...

Amira Amirudin said...

maryam...my first baby pun macam tu jugak....even the 2nd one when it comes to sleeping pattern...semua nya bila mlm...mata celik...ends up we moms sleep-deprived. About 1 month, like your mom said...dia akan gradually ikut normal sleeping pattern. What I did..I put on table light at night....so that my baby knows it's night and time to sleep.

BF with your baby next to you...laying side by side...this trick works for me (until now) so that I get the much needed sleep.

Don't worry yam...all moms experience the same thing. Now the 2nd baby, it's definitely easier...

Putri Z. said...

maryam..kesiannya dgr story u..your mum is actually right. for the first one month, babies can't tell the difference between night and day. by the time you think that your baby has a proper routine, she'll go back being all erratic again.

Taking care of my baby was not easy too. Dah le I had to syringe feed him till he was almost a month old, by the time he knew how to suckle, i was in so much pain! Nobody ever told me that breastfeeding would be so painful! Bleeding pon ade jugak, especially during pumping, so I had to reduce the suction power a bit. apparently, our nipples are not used to breastfeeding initially, so mcm lembut sket. dat's y it's prone to cracking and bleeding.

there were nights when I tak tido langsung, until azan subuh the next day. I couldn't even put him down, coz he'll be awake and start crying all over again. so tido duduk je la on the bed with him in my arms.

Don't worry. Be strong and get as much help from others as possible. You need all the help you can get in the initial stage. Husband, parents, in laws, maid, etc. Once she reaches 2 months, insya allah she'll be ok..

Putri

Mrs Ahmad.. said...

Thanks so much for all your advice. I'm trying my best to be strong. Nobody says being a mom is easy peasy rite? Putri, my gosh I pun mcm u jugak. I sleep in sitting position every night to the xtend that my bum became numb! And Amira, I wish I can lay on my side while BF my baby but unfortunately I ended up having pelvic pain (probably sebab I had cesarean section kot).